I haven't been married, Although I do hope so very soon. The reason I decided to post this is because there's barely any information or first hand experience about do it yourself divorce online. So it's not really a first hand experience, literally because it wasn't my divorce and I am in the Philippines and not in New Jersey, but I can very much say that it's like 80% first hand experience.
A quick story of the long story, I have a fiance (yes, he proposed to me before he gotten divorced, he's cool like that) who is a Filipino American, (you get it!?) in New Jersey, who was separated from his wife for 4 years before I met him (had to make that clear!). When US happened, he wanted a divorce right away but did not know where to start, how, and how much. He can't really afford an attorney cause he was also planning to visit me here in the Philippines. And I turned to Mr. Google, and learned as much as I know about Pro Se Divorce in New Jersey.
Pro Se - representing yourself in court, without an attorney.
Hopefully before you reached my blog that you have already read some (a lot) information about divorce in New Jersey, and don't take this post as a legal advise or something.
I figured someone out there who cannot afford to hire a lawyer and thinking about doing it yourself might want to read about someone's experience, so here it is.
I read a lot about Pro Se divorce and told my boyfriend the gist, that it is possible, yet was he still not sure so I told him he might want to talk to the ombudsman.
In Ocean county there is a judiciary ombudsman, it is a customer service oriented program that: assists court users by distributing information to help them navigate their way through the court system; presents public education programs about the court; and addresses complaints from the public. The ombudsman was really nice and helpful. My boyfriend called the office first and was accommodated that afternoon. He was given forms for Pro Se but also was advised to retain an attorney, and he was given a list of where to get free attorneys.
He checked with the free attorneys' office but he did not qualify. So he decided to do it Pro Se.
I was ready for action, and got divorce form online, but he doesn't trust it (or me? LOL) so we wanted "professional form maker", jk. He hired the service of Divorce Center, for a little over $400. They took 2 months to write up his divorce papers.
He then filed the papers for $300+ at the clerk of court's office.
But something strange happened, we waited for two months and has not received anything from the court. At 6 weeks of waiting am I was impatient, I felt something was wrong. I told him to follow up but he said it's better not to annoy them. well then, I annoyed him instead until at the 2 month' mark, I said you better go and check cause it cannot be this long. He went to the court and found out, they don't have his papers, he was waiting for nothing, he hand deliver this and somehow it magically disappeared. The cheque wasn't cashed out though. So he called the divorce center and ask then for more copies of the papers since the clerk of court lost his and they told him he needs to pay a fudging $150 to reprint the papers!!!! So he went to the ombudsman's office, (it's probably in the same vicinity, I'm not sure) and told her about the dilema. The Ombudsman gave him divorce forms and instructed him how to fill it up. He went home to fill up the paper works and this time he mailed everything through certified mail, return receipt requested. And two weeks after he received paper works with the docket number for his divorce case.
One of the most important part of the process is serving his wife the divorce papers. He sent the paper works to the sheriff but she no longer lives at the address she gave him months before. It took a couple of months before he was able to get in touch with her, and she doesn't want to be served by a sheriff, she only gave a PO box address.
He mailed her the divorce complaint, acknowledgement of service and waiver of service and permission to go on default ( these were the papers works from the ombudsman not from divorce center) After many weeks, she sent back these documents, signed and notarized. My boyfriend was happy to bring them to the clerk of court. But when he got there, he was advised that they need a settlement agreement.
If you have read up on going on default trial, well, it is I think possible unless the spouse is on active military duty, but in my boyfriend's case, she was not served by a sheriff, she mailed an acknowledgment of service. I'm not sure if it was the procedure or they were just trying to be helpful to my boyfriend, but that's what they told him. Get a settlement agreement.
He was pissed, he went there thinking about getting a court date, he doesn't want to deal with the EX anymore, so I told him, relax, I'll call the divorce center since he doesn't have a paper work for a settlement agreement. Skype lets me call toll free numbers even if I am in the Philippines. When I called up the Divorce Center they told me that my boyfriend's case wasn't set up to be like that, it was set up that the Sheriff will serve the papers and she was supposed to go on default and no settlement agreement should have been necessary. If my boyfriend wants, they can make another paper work for $150. He got more pissed when I told him that.
And I told him again, chill baby! I gotcha. I'll write it up, text your ex you need her cooperation one last time, and mail it to her ASAP. I wrote the agreement that afternoon and it was signed by him and notarized and mailed out before dinner.
It took about 3 weeks for him to received the documents again. And he gingerly (hahaha) brought it to the clerk of court May 25 in the afternoon, and got a hearing date for June 21.
I'll let you know what happens after.
No comments:
Post a Comment